Dude Food: Cornmeal-Crusted, Drunk-Seitan w/ Dijon Tartar Sauce & Cauliflower Mash

Last night, my roommate Jodi and I made this recipe to add to our catering company, Savory & Seed‘s arsenal – it’s crispy, filling, and tender – satisfying enough for the skeptical meat-eater and delicious enough for people to ask how the heck you made that seitan so juicy and flavorful. So the next time you are having a few people over for grub – this recipe can be whipped up in under 30 minutes.

Cornmeal Crusted Seitan

(serves 4)

You will need :

1 cup vital wheat glutan
1/4 cup nutritional yeast
1/4 cup matzoh meal or bread crumbs
1 cup cornmeal
1/2 cup beer (lager)
2 tbsp tahini or cashew butter
2 cubes (or 2 Tablespoons) vegan bullion
1 tbsp olive oil
1 tbsp Soy or Tamari
1 tsp seat salt
1 tbsp black pepper
1 tsp garlic powder
canola oil

Tarter Sauce:
1/4 cup vegan mayonaise
1/4 cup sweet relish
2 tbsp dijon mustard
cayanne pepper

Cauliflower Mash:
1/2 head cauliflower
2 tbsp Earth Balance (or other non-dairy butter)
1/4 cup non-dairy milk (rice, soy or almond)
2 cloves garlic
1 tsp allspice


  • In a mixing bowl combine the wheat gluten with the nutritional yeast, bread crumbs, salt, and dry spices. Mix until uniformly combined.
  • Add (but do not mix) the oil, tahini, soy, vinegar and bullion (dissolve bullion in 2 tbsp hot water if necessary)
  • Add Beer
  • VERY GENTLY fold the batter only a few times (this ensures the seitan will not become rubbery) then using your hands – form into a long, flat dough.
  • If the dough is too wet (falling apart in your hands) add more gluten flour until it holds together.
  • In a large pot of boiling water, boil dough for 15 minutes, flipping once. It will grow in size.
  • In a separate shallow bowl, place cornmeal with salt and pepper
  • remove seitan from boiling water, let cool for a few minutes
  • cut seitan into 4 pieces, then press each side in cornmeal
  • pan-fry on medium-high heat in 1/4 inch of canola oil until crisp and golden on each side

Tartar sauce

  • combine vegan mayo (Veganaise, Nasoya) with sweet relish and mustard.
  • add cayanne to taste

Cauliflower Mash

  • Steam cauliflower 15 minutes until tender
  • in a small pan, sautee garlic in Earth Balance until golden
  • in a bowl, mash cauliflower with fork or mixers, adding all other ingredients

Serve on a large steamed leaf like swiss chard or collard. Try this dish with a spicy Malbec red wine from Argentina.

DB’s Etiquette Recommendation: When hosting a dinner, make sure your guests feel comfortable by cleaning up and setting the table ahead of time. Unless it’s a movie party, turn the TV off. Soft music is always welcome, but make sure to ask your guests if they mind – and lastly, don’t talk about yourself the whole time!

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Written by TheDiscerningBrute

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